2 People, 4 Cats and a Dream: Everyone Needs a Girls' Weekend

This past weekend I hosted Girls' Weekend at my house. I have a group of girlfriends that I'm not even sure how we all grouped together, but we meet up at one girl's house for a weekend every couple of months. This is not Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants here, I'd like to think we're a little more mature that that. We're not quite Sex in the City either, but somewhere in the middle. I haven't seen Girls on HBO yet, so I'm not sure how we measure up there. The fun thing about a group of girls is that the sum of or entity of the group is an ever-evolving thing depending on the changes and experiences of each girl in the group.

Crystal, Me, T, Amy and Jill at a girls weekend that Amy hosted in 2008

We have five girls in our group. Every group is different, and is it made up of all of my best friends? Not originally, but they have all become that level of friend through the group. Of course I have extremely close friends outside of the group too. What I argue is that meeting up with your group is at the least beneficial, and at the most, life-saving.

Jill, T, Crystal, Me and Amy, Crystal's Wedding 2009

I'm sure you have those out there, friends from college, friends from a first job (which is where my group stemmed from), mom groups, etc. where groups have formed of girls that hang out together, and as life changes and we move, get new jobs, have kids, get married, whatever, start to drift apart. Here are 10 reasons why you have to keep that group getting together, at least periodically, forever.

T, Jill, Amy, Crystal and Me at Jill's bachelorette

Your group is a support system. Yes you have parents, families, husbands, wives, kids, whatever, but your group of girls can support you in a way no one else can. At least one person in the group has probably had a similar experience and can share advice or empathy. The other girls in the group may not have had that shared experience, but they can still be a phone call when you need to talk, or in my case, show up for an impromptu girls weekend when Randy was on a business trip to Germany. We've all been there for each other through break-ups, engagements, pregnancies, mother in laws from hell (not mine of course, Joni is the bomb), loss of jobs, etc.

Crystal carrying one of my first cakes, Jill's Birthday 2008

Your group can teach you things you don't do well. I'm a baker, not a chef. In fact, back in 2001 when I lived with two of my girls, Jill and T, I made a chicken pot pie that still comes up in conversation accompanied by peels of laughter (don't add that can of water that the cream of chicken soup can recommends). But from watching T and helping her in the kitchen, I have picked up some tips. Crystal has given me tips on how to improve upon things I have made. Now I can follow a recipe and cook chicken that isn't dry. Am I a master chef? Heck no, but I have seen vast improvements in my kitchen confidence and abilities. And I have given them demonstrations in baking and cupcake design.

Jill, T and Crystal in Crystal's kitchen 2009

Your friends encourage you and offer business and career advice, as well as boy advice or interior design advice :) In our group we have a Marketing VP, a Proposal Writer, a Stay at Home Mom/Vet Tech and a Marketing/Creative Manager. We have some overlap, but for the most part, vastly different educations and backgrounds. If I throw an issue out about my job, or ideas for Sugar Whim, they listen and give constructive comments. They even come to my cupcake tasting parties and give me honest feedback, even though they know I know their handwriting. It's because they want me to be better, just like I want that for them.

Jill, T, Crystal and I at Crystal's Bridal Shower

Your friends can help you network. This one is really obvious, but worth mentioning. Your friends know people who know people who might be able to help you find a new job. They may know of a reliable mechanic, a good insurance company, or a good hosting company for your first company website. Their experiences are like gold when you are getting married, having a baby, or launching a small business.

Jill and T, bridesmaids at my wedding in 2006

Your friends remind you not to take yourself so seriously. I've known T, Crystal and Jill since I graduated from college. I've known Amy not quite as long, but for a pretty long time as well. I've worked long on hard on my education, but they can look at me blankly after supporting me for years and years and say, "I have no idea what you do. Can you explain it to me?"

Jill modeling some boxers

You can talk about all those things in Cosmo that make you blush, or the weird things that happen to your body when you're pregnant (or hitting menopause, etc.) This one is self explanatory. I won't go into any cringe-inducing details for any men out there.

Crystal, her son, me, Jill, Ames & T at Jill's baby shower

Your friends are your benchmark. I don't mean this like you should compare yourself to your friends, or be jealous of things they have. Seeing their successes reminds you to keep striving towards your goals and to keep setting new ones. This is the old adage from high school. Having hard working friends encourages you to work harder too.

Limelight, the eco-friendly clothing company Crystal and I started before we realized we didn't like to sew that much.

Your girls are like Pinterest in real life. Crystal always has awesome shoes, good organizational tips and creative business ideas. T is very efficient in her life, her speech and her cleaning. Amy always knows the place to get the most luxurious, laid-back and comfy blankets, shoes, rugs, etc., and will go shopping with me looking for anything and everything. Jill is extremely organized and also, like T, good at cleaning quickly and thoroughly, and like Crystal and Amy, gifted with interior design.

Conan O'Brien and Crystal

Getting together is funnier than old episodes of Friends. Saturday morning I got out of the shower and thought Randy was watching a sitcom with the laugh track turned up. No, he was downstairs telling the girls stories about God knows what, and they were laughing so loud, it echoed in the bathroom upstairs. We have a tradition that every Friday night of girls weekend, we gather at the home of choice, have dinner and tell stories and catch up until we're all completely worn out and have to go to bed. There have been many times where we have laughed so hard, we had tears streaming down our faces. I can see these girls after months and months and say a choice word or two and we'll all be cracking up again.

Jill and her dad at the Temple/Penn State game with my family in 2007

Your shared experiences will continue to grow. The chicken pot pie fiasco and my vacuuming of dog hair off of T's area rug (I couldn't get it up in the vacuum, and knowing T was a stickler for a neat house, I was using the vacuum attachment and vacuuming the carpet inch by inch) will always be funny. But T freaking out over bees at a winery a few years ago, or visiting Crystal in the hospital when her first baby was born are newer great memories.